Colossians 3:17-25, 4:1 And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God: And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons. Masters, give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven.
In this passage, the Apostle Paul lays out a structure for the family based on both hierarchy and reciprocity of relations.
The charge to wives is different than the charge given to husbands. Wives are to submit to their husbands and husbands are to love their wives. This language reflects hierarchy and mutuality.
Some might ask, "What if my husband doesn't obey Christ?" Peter addresses this in another place.
1 Peter 3:1 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
This is a hard word for many women. The command to a husband to love his wife is equally hard.
All things are to be done under the headship of Christ because we all serve Christ.
We are called to do what we do as to the Lord.
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